Sunday, October 08, 2006

The Verdict Is In On The Mohawk

I realized something while watching the Sunday night game between Pittsburgh and San Diego. It was during the player introductions and they showed the Chargers defense. Chargers linebacker Shawn Merriman introduced himself and it suddenly hit me. Man, a mohawk looks great on that guy. I mean the mohawk is no easy hairstyle to pull off, not everyone can wear it without looking like a total loser. With that being said, I have developed the following criteria to judge whether or not someone should rock the mohawk.

1) Let's say you want to get in a work out. You know pump those muscles up a little. Do you A) put on spandex and head off to pilates class, making sure to bring along a bottle of Evian water so you don't get dehydrated or B) maybe grab a shirt,it doesn't matter if it's clean or not, head to the gym, squat till you puke, then let some guy punch on your midsection just to toughen it up a little.

2) Let's say you're at the club. Someone bumps you and spills your drink. He doesn't say excuse me. Do you A)let it slide, hey it is crowded in here! or B) immediately get in his face demanding an apology, prepared to beat one out of him if he doesn't cough it up.

Finally, 3)Who cuts you hair to give you the mohizawk? A) Pierre at the Salon, no one else touches your locks or B) your boy T-Bone who learned to cut hair in the pen. Sometimes his pitbulls can be annoying while you sit in the chair, but you like how he hooks up your hair.

If your answers were A, then you ain't gonna pull of the mohawk. If you answered B's, you prolly could rock the 'hawk and looks straight. Here is a helpful visual aid.

This mohawk works...
This one doesn't work.

He looks cool with the gold hawk...
He looks like a puss. He comes hard rockin' the 'hawk.
He couldn't be softer if he were a stuffed animal.

As for this guy, I'm still not sure what category he falls into. But I am pretty sure he invented the mohawk, so I had to include him.


Blogger Phil Silva said...

isnt that jack osbourne. didnt tom osbourne recruit me?

2:06 PM  
Blogger pete silva said...

those a and b comparisons were pretty damn sick

4:13 PM  

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